Just when I was about to put fingers to keyboard in an unprecedented rage, the
letter of all letters arrived. This letter, ladies and gentleman,
is the letter I have been dreaming of for months. The letter
that made me smile just pondering the possibilities. This
letter, is the letter from the Mairie
informing me that my child, my precious little baby boy whom I
love with all my heart, has finally attained a place in the
halte garderie.
I’ve been jumping up and down, dancing jigs and singing “Oh Happy Day” since my husband
came back from the mailbox brandishing the letter. I’ve read
said letter five times just to be sure that it says what I think
it says, and I’ve already called and set up my rendez-vous with the directrice. I had to stop myself from driving by (pushing the stroller rather)
to get a look at the establishment. My cup over-runneth.
Now let me explain to you why.
The French School System: Here’s a quick lesson on how it works here, and why my letter makes my life easier.
In France children start school at three years old. Yes, at the bright young age of three
they are ready to enter into what we would call “Pre-school” in
the United States, or “Pre-Nursery School” in the UK. Until your
children are three, you’ll probably need some help with
childcare (especially if you work full time or even part time),
or unless you are one of the few lucky ones having family nearby to help you.
The first choice is of course your regular babysitter. With this solution you search
and find your own caretaker, through advertisement in local
papers or boulangerie (bakery) windows. This can be an
expensive option, but sometimes you can get lucky. One place
that I’ve found helpful is a web site
bebe-annonces.com
that offers part-time or full-time babysitters (or you can place your own ad).
Another choice is to hire an Assistant Maternelle. This babysitter
keeps up to four children in her home, but will only take your
child full-time. So, if you only need a part-time babysitter,
this solution is not the best alternative- unless you don’t mind
paying for the days your child stays home with you. However, an
Assistant Maternelle is a good choice because they are
usually highly trained and receive inspections by the State. If
I needed full-time day care, this would be my personal choice. The environment is more controlled, and
there are fewer children. You can usually find the list of
Assistant Maternelles in your area through the PMI (Protection
Maternelle et Infantile) organization, or through the Mairie (town hall).
After those two choices, we then come to the day care centers that are
run by the State.
For starters, there’s the jardin d’enfants or crèche. While most
parents use these as full-time daycare centers, they usually
offer part-time programs as well. The alternative is the halte
garderie. The halte garderie is usually part time, but it
depends on your neighborhood and the amount of kids on the
waiting list. Some allow kids to go everyday, some only once or
twice a week. Both of these alternatives are very inexpensive
compared to the previously mentioned choices of day care,
and that’s why the waiting lists are so long. Every family wants
a place at the crèche, if possible.
I Was On the List
I’d been on the waiting list and the waiting list had been on me, weighing down on my
shoulders like a sack of old potatoes. I love my son and honor
the chance to be with him day in and day out, but let’s face it,
even the sanest and strongest of mothers needs a day off, or at
least a half day off! I never knew that three free hours in one
week would sound so marvelous, and yet it does. It reminds me
over and over again: What in the heck was I doing with all my
free time before I had a baby?
It is so unlike the United States, where you go to a day care, sign up, and
your child just starts going. If that particular day care is full, you simply call
another one. Sometimes you need to sign up in advance, and
sometimes there’s no waiting list at all (depends on your State
and or City of course.) Not so here. Quite literally, you are
expected to sign up for childcare as soon as you are aware that
you pregnant and my friends who had been through it before did
warn me: “Sign up for the crèche now! Do it now! Now! Now! Now!”
And I thought, surely it can’t be that bad. (Read about
my experience on pariswoman.com "Ode to 75008"). I’d had my baby and he
was already five months old! Yikes! Therefore I got put on the
waiting list. The shame list. The didn’t you know you were moving here? list.
(And for the record, no I did not.)
I called their offices every week and disturbed their coffee and smoke breaks. They
knew who I was: That American who keeps checking her status.
When I visited their office to maybe cry in their laps and
insist on some moyen de garde, (type of daycare) they
knew who I was: That American who calls every week to check on
her status. I half expected armed guards to come and cart us
away. Still, they had no sympathy for me.
The last time I called a certain person told me that I wouldn’t have a place until late
2005. I stopped calling then (I think that was their strategy
all along) and took to hiring a part-time babysitter who
charged me an arm, leg and one eye to keep my adorable son so
that I could WRITE and go kick butt in my Ju-Jitsu class.
Ah, life’s simple pleasures.
I was just about to introduce the notion of private daycares here, and open at least
600 of them …But alas, now my letter has come! They’re saved. Yippee! Hooray!
The moral of this tale? Sign up early. Even before you get pregnant (if you’re planning
to) start looking into childcare possibilities here. Check with
the Mairie in your neighborhood for information. If
you’re already on the the halte garderie or crèche
waiting list and are out there wallowing in the lack of
childcare pit as I was, hang in there. One day you’ll get
your letter too. Just nicely harass them until they know you by
name and/or nationality. In the end, I think it might actually
help.
Good luck and Stay strong!
through my eyes...
